5 Stages of Grieving Oprah

by Connie

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Oprah has left her talk show behind, after 25 years on the air.

With more than 5000 taped episodes, you’re hooked.

How will you go on?

What are you going to do?

Any thoughts how you’ll fill the deep void in your life which used to be consumed by 5 hours of ‘The Oprah Show’ each week?

Have you contemplated how you’ll fill the bottomless crevasse which will soon be left vacant by Oprah leaving you?

I’ve got a solution I think will help.

Five Stages of Grief

Most of you are familiar with the Five Stages of Grief.

For those of you unfamiliar with this term, it’s a process coined by Elisabeth Kubler-Ross, whereby people manage grief and tragedy in their life.

The Five Stages of Grief are also known by the acronym DABDA:

  1. Denial,
  2. Anger,
  3. Bargaining,
  4. Depression
  5. and Acceptance.

Not everyone experiences every stage in the process. Nor do most go through the DABDA process step-by-step, in a linear manner.

Some steps may be skipped while other steps may be repeated, causing the person to get stuck in that stage.

Never-the-less ‘The Five Stages of Grief’ are the model for helping you work through your Five Stages of Grieving Oprah.

This process is aimed at giving you tools to equip you to cope with your loss of ‘the Big O’ and move on with your life.

The sooner you get started, the sooner you’ll feel some relief.

Let’s begin, shall we?

5 Stages of Grieving Oprah

1.) Denial- The loss of Oprah feels overwhelming and life without her may not make any sense.

Your thoughts may range from ‘I never got tickets to her show. This can’t be happening.’ to ‘How will I go on without Oprah?’

You’re just trying to make it through each day without her to guide you.

Listen for Dr. Oz’s voice in your head, telling you to take deep breaths to center yourself.

You’re beginning your healing process.

You’re becoming more self-confident.

Congratulations! While this may feel disorienting, you’re beginning to own your personal power.

2.) Anger- The more you allow yourself to feel your anger, the more it will dissipate.

You may feel angry that Oprah’s abandoning you.

Without her, how will you know which charities to support?

How will you know which book to read?

You may even be angry at God or the Universe.

You find yourself thinking, ‘What God would allow Oprah to leave network TV? I ask you, is that a loving Universe?’

Beneath your anger your strength is beginning to shine through.

Stay with the anger.

It shows you’re feeling.

We all know how much Oprah likes it when you feel.

3.) Bargaining- You begin negotiating with your higher power, hoping Oprah will come to her senses.

If Ms. Winfrey could just feel part of your loss and the pain she is causing, certainly she’d come back to you.

You begin bargaining making promises like, ‘If you’ll let Oprah return for another season, I’ll devote my life to educating homeless llamas, the world over.’

Guilt is the companion of bargaining.

You think, ‘If I only devoted myself completely to the lifestyle Oprah told me I should be living, she wouldn’t have left me.’

Or, ‘It must be my fault Oprah’s not coming back to tape more shows. I wasn’t worthy of her guidance and direction.’

You’re trying to negotiate yourself out of your pain, by remaining and living in the past.

As Confucius said,

‘The only constant is change.’

The time for change has come.

It’s time for you to move on.

4.) Depression- You feel like your pain and sadness will last forever.

You want to withdrawal from life.

It feels like you’re living in a fog.

You find yourself wondering if there’s any point to living a life without Oprah.

Without vicariously watching hundreds receive ‘Oprah’s Favorite Things’ each year, how will you ever find joy again?

How could you possibly know what to buy when you win the Lottery, without Ms. Winfrey showing you the possibilities?

You scoff at the passing notion that you could find happiness by living your own life, rather than Oprah telling you how to live yours.

After all, she coined the phrase ‘Live your best life.’

That makes her an expert.

Doesn’t it?

Well, doesn’t it?

The loss of Oprah is fully absorbed into your being.

You get that she’s not coming back.

The thought that you’ll finally be responsible for your own life, making your own decisions and facing the consequences scares the ever-living-poop out of you.

You hear the taunting voice of self-doubt ask, ‘How will you ever live life without Oprah in it?’

It’s time to celebrate reaching this stage.

You’re becoming your own person.

On your own.

Without Oprah to guide you.

Whoo, whoo, whoo!

Let’s hear it for You!

5.) Acceptance- You’re beginning to come to terms with your loss.  This stage is about recognizing that this is your new reality.

You begin to realize that you need to learn to adjust to a life without the Big O telling you:

  • who you are,
  • what you believe in,
  • what to read,
  • what movies or plays to see,
  • who or what to support,
  • how to dress and
  • how you should feel.

For the first time in a long time you recognize that your life does have significance and purpose.

You acknowledge that it’s your job to define your meaning and function, not some stranger who you’ve never met, yet you’ve worshipped from afar.

You find yourself living again, enjoying your life, knowing it’s yours to steer and control.

It’s about tapping into your authentic personal power, not someone else’s.

You’re investing 5 new-found hours each week renewing connections with family and friends, creating meaningful relationships instead of being mesmerized by Oprah while bathed in the glow of your TV.

You’re creating a new relationship with yourself.

You’re listening to what you need.

You never needed anyone else to tell you what to do.

You’ve always had all the answers inside of you.

You just needed to listen.

And you needed to trust your own voice.

In the process, you’re challenging yourself.

You’re on your way to growing, expanding, and evolving.

And you’re doing it all on your own.

Without any help or support from Oprah.

It’s all about knowing.

It’s about you knowing you.

In the Wizard of Oz, Glinda the Good Witch said:

‘Home is a place we all must find, child.

It’s not just a place where you eat or sleep.

Home is knowing. Knowing your mind, knowing your heart, knowing your courage. If we know ourselves, we’re always home, anywhere.’

Welcome Home!

Oprah photo from Mobylives

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